TO HAVE THIS JOY AGAIN

The Swing

How do you like to go up in a swing,
Up in the air so blue?
Oh, I do think it the pleasantest thing
Ever a child can do!

Up in the air and over the wall,
Till I can see so wide,
River and trees and cattle and all
Over the countryside--

Till I look down on the garden green,
Down on the roof so brown--
Up in the air I go flying again,
Up in the air and down!

by Robert Louis Stevenson




Does your child like to swing? Ayn loved to swing and could do this anytime in the safety of her own backyard. I wonder if she has had the opportunity to do this in the past 275 days that she has not been at home? We don't know if she ever gets outside to play. Dad was supposed to get weekly reports but he has had very few in the 39 weeks Ayn has been gone. It may be comforting to know she was able to do some of the things she enjoys.

Today, March 16 Ayn will have a visit with her mom Amie. It is just a couple of hours but hopefully that will soon change. Back in October, before visits were stopped for unknown reasons, preparations were underway for Amie to have longer visits, unsupervised visits and overnights. Everyone is hopeful that soon this plan will be a reality. They will be able to do things outside, maybe They can enjoy swinging together in a park.

The next time you are swinging with your child, pushing them on a swing or just enjoying the moments watching them swing, stop and say a prayer of thanks and a prayer that Ayn and her family will soon enjoy these times together again.

YOUR PARENTAL RIGHTS WITH CHILD PROTECTIVE SERVICES

by Mea Jones

The reason MCFD has so much power is that people have been led to believe that they really do care about the best interests of the child. If this were true, however, you would not see horrific cases of injustice such as what happened to the Bayne family (please Google: Paul and Zabeth Bayne and Fifth Estate), nor would you have such monumental injustice as what is occurring right now with a beautiful, sweet Autistic girl named Ayn, who was essentially stolen from her loving, caring and competent father, Derek Hoare.

Ayn has been in MCFD custody since June 2011, in the basement of a foster "parent" who gets paid very well. However, even though the foster parent gets paid very well, they still had another foster child administer drugs to Ayn and Ayn has escaped their custody, and once was found naked wandering on a main street. MCFD has acknowledged Derek is a good dad, and admitted there was no abuse or neglect.

We have blindly given MCFD so much power, yet they are completely unaccountable. Oh sure, the Representative for Children and Youth will get all up in arms when there is a freak murder or someone dues in foster custody. But MCFD doesn't really mind because the upshot of this uproar is always to get more money and power and sympathy for MCFD and those poor "overworked" social workers.

If parents knew how easy it is to lose their children, forever, and what the fate of the vast majority of children in MCFD custody really is (horrific, with a much greater chance of abuse/death than parental care), they would be shocked. The truth is, any nasty person, any social worker - for that matter - can call MCFD anonymously and make a false report and you could easily lose your child or baby forever. And this is an experience that is worse than a child's death.

So, the next time you read about how kids are getting taken away from their parents because they smoke or the kids are too fat or the parents aren't deemed intelligent enough, instead of cheering the "child protectors on, ask yourself this: if the government is such a great parent how come so many of the kids in their custody get murdered, abused in every way, grow up to be homeless, drug addicts, suicidal and incarcerated in such huge numbers?

Parental rights? You have none. Do some research and see what they've done to Derek Hoare and his daughter, Ayn. All in the best interests of the child. Right.

Blogger's note: I would suggest further reading on this subject and specifically “children’s rights” with this article by Ray Ferris who is a retired child-protection worker and the author of The Art of Child Protection

Ray Ferris: A British Columbia myth about the best interests of children http://www.straight.com/article-624596/vancouver/ray-ferris-british-columbia-myth-about-best-interests-children 

DEREK ASKS US ALL, " PLEASE WALK WITH ME IN THIS BATTLE"

So where to even begin.... as I am sure most would understand the last 8 ½ months have been beyond nightmarish. Tortuous does not begin to describe this either, the reality is that I have dedicated my life to my kids. I have dropped everything to ensure their happiness and development and to have this culminate in an attack by my own government, who has taken no time to understand my children or my family yet claim some authoritarian power over it is monstrous. To make matters worse this is being done under the guise of “help”. They throw around phrases like “child’s best interest” as if they empower them with some dictatorial aura, yet have no idea what those words even mean.

We are now 8 ½ months in..... 263 days..... and my daughter has yet to see an autism expert. The closest she came was a tertiary glance by their resident expert on day 45, who told them to not treat my child as a psych patient. I have requested the assessment, input and opinion of an autism expert since the very beginning, yet we continue to wait. How quickly they rushed to have her drugged and put into a psych ward, yet still have yet to enlist the expertise of an expert in her known, diagnosed condition... autism. I have spent dozens and dozens of hours trying to explain the situation to them, trying to explain how to appropriately treat a child with autism, to try to get them to understand the concerning behaviours of autism and how it was this terrible mistake was made.

Within the first six months Ayn had already had 4 different social workers, this fact has been used as a consistent excuse by MCFD who justifies their inaction and ignorance with a claim of “staffing issues”. And while I try to be empathetic to the daunting task faced by each new worker to get caught up to speed, the reality is that my child and family continues to languish whilst this persists. And rather than pick up where we left off with the previous social worker they simply want to begin anew, of course each time however we are further along in the unabating process.

MCFD continues to arrive to the variety of meetings uninformed, operating under a blanket liability protection which does not hold them to any standard of quality.

What I am about to type will require qualification and I will be drawing up an elaborate timeline of this whole ordeal to do so; however the reality is that MCFD has not done anything in terms of an investigation or a plan of care since Sept 20th, nothing. On Sept 26th they were granted a 22 day interim order to give them time to complete an investigation (which never happened), we are still operating under that interim order to this day... that is 159 days.... on a 22 day order. Now is the painfully slow judicial process to blame? No not really, it would be nice if the wait times were not as long as they are, but that is no excuse for MCFD to literally have done nothing in terms of my daughters care or keeping me informed of her well being. I have faced: broken promises, lies, threats, stonewalling, willful ignorance, silence... ohhh the silence.

Now as per the restrictions on my speech in regards to the Mar 2nd Mediation, I will try to elaborate on my understanding therein. Sect 24 of the CFCSA is quite clear that anything “obtained” in mediation must not be disclosed, so in essence anything NEW which was disclosed at mediation cannot be disclosed, except under a few circumstances which I likely do not meet, except arguably “d) if the disclosure is necessary for a child’s safety”. However until I get some further clarification on that point I will refrain from such disclosure. Now that does not mean I have to shut up or that anyone else does either, as a matter of fact screaming from the rooftops is one of the few recourses left available to us and I intend to use it.

With that said I am facing an escalating battle not an improving one, one which is taking place on many different fronts; my time on FB will be limited, my time in front of cameras or in print will be on the rise, and the time I need to spend studying will also continue to be pressed only to the limits of my fatigue. I ask for everyone’s help spreading the word about this and keeping up a dialog on how it is we got to this point and what we can do to inform others of what is happening, not simply in regards to Ayn, but to the “child protection system” which has strayed so far from its goal to now become an imposing threat to the safety of children and not the heroic saviour they would like to cast themselves to be. If the populace knew how this worked it would not be tolerated, and in fact will serve as a clear exemplification of why the granting of such powers under blanket liability protections is a terrible and dangerous thing.

So please please please, walk with me in this battle, in whatever capacity your individual talents endow. We have been setting up groups to facilitate this movement, and will need all the help we can get; what it will take is simply communication and coordination between everyone.

We love our kids, and we as their parents need to advocate for them.... to treat an issue as serious as the removal of a child(ren) with such casual disregard is not tolerable, my child is not a number....

Her name is Ayn... she has hopes, dreams, fears and loves.... I am one of them and I will not let her down.

I HAVE TO RANT TODAY!

by Kendra Pettengill

Do they impose a gag order before the mediation begins or after you have completed it? What could possibly be the consequences of refusing to agree to one...let's see..they have already taken your child away, failed to meet a single court date by law...made promises and then took them back, failed at every turn to negotiate in good faith, and set a final court date another year away, meaning you have probably lost your child for at least 2 years. Have they ever given a valid reason for removal in the first place? Have they ever stated what their overall goal here is, or is it simply to torment the family?

This entire thing is so beyond the pale of logic, reason, intelligence or any other rational thought process that it leaves one wondering as to the actual motives behind the entire thing. In the entire space of time since this began I have still yet to hear their actual reason for removal that could in any way be validated by legal or moral precedent. I have yet to hear one request by MCFD as to what might be done by any party to right the ship. I cannot even say they are drawing a line and then arbitrarily moving that line so that Derek can never meet it...I haven't heard of a line at all, ever in this case. Derek is simply left in limbo regarding his own child to flounder and flail about with no goal, purpose, or goalposts to meet or even shoot for in the future. The only terms for this are torture and torment. These are some sick sadistic *&^%$ who seem to get off on this crap.

I still stand amazed and stunned at the cruelty of my fellow human beings and our impotence to put a stop to it, no matter how hard we try or how badly we may want to change things. A single day never passes that I do not think, "There has to be a way" there has to be a method to reach someone in ultimate power that would demand answers.

So Derek is left at every step, hoping he is doing the right thing, wishing he had formal guidance to know so, and praying it will all come out in the end, no matter what miss-steps might be taken.

Meanwhile there are MCFD pulling strings attached to his arms and laughing at how they can make him twist and turn in agony, and apparently getting the biggest kick out of it, while they mumble under their breath, "don't ever $#% with us again Derek, do you understand now who has the power....we thought you might. Hahahahhaha".

It is humanly impossible to come out of this process whole or unscathed. It is the ultimate proof that the mandate of MCFD is to inflict as much damage as possible because this process can never ever be for the good of any child or family, even if there is real abuse, as the abuse from MCFD is much deeper and lasting.

I am not even related to this family and I feel wounded, damaged, as I too have a child on the spectrum, and they have in affect made every single one of us stop, pause, consider, worry, and fear that we may be next...if we dare challenge their authority to interfere in our home, challenge the school or make demands for our children that should be guaranteed by the law, or simply decide to care for our children outside the accepted iatrogenic paradigm. They have affectively made over 1 million people look over their shoulder every day, because they can take our child and they never need to justify it, validate evidence, or answer to a higher authority. They just repeat the mantra to government and media, sssshhhhhh we can't talk about it, protecting the child, the best interest of the child....trust us, we are the experts, we know what is best for your child, you, your family, society, we are in control here. And everyone is so hoodwinked that they must have a valid reason, that things must go on in secrecy for our own good, that even reasonable and learned judges simply rubber stamp the MCFDs rumors, heresy, and take their word for it, no matter how little real evidence, and simply believe that case workers are actually concerned about the welfare of the child.

All I can say is bless you Derek and Godspeed, because you are up against Evil.

I AM TRYING TO UNDERSTAND

Every day I come to this blog to change the date and the day count for this unbelievable story. I keep thinking this can't go on much longer but it looks like MCFD plans will have me doing this until day 611. I am a very passionate advocate for those on the autism spectrum and this little girl has stolen my heart. Not a day goes by, likely many hours everyday, that I don't think about her and her family and pray that they will soon be reunited.

On June 16, 2011 Ayn, then 9 years old, was "legally kidnapped" from school. I say "legally" because that would be the claim of this Ministry of Children and Family Development, the Provincial Government of British Columbia, Canada. I say "kidnapped" because she was abducted from school by people she did not know, against her father's wishes; taken to a house she did not know and then to a hospital she did not know where she was heavily drugged to control her behavior. The hospital did release Ayn with a written report for a clean bill of health, no signs of neglect or abuse.

I am trying to think if I have ever known a 9 year old child who would not be very frightened in this situation and lash out at those they would perceive to be attackers. Would a child understand why this was happening, why school staff would let it happen, why their parent didn't stop this? I don't think so. And, this little girl is autistic and would have  greater difficulty and certainly not be able to communicate her fears any other way than behaviorally.

Months ago her abductors, MCFD, told her parents they would be sending her home. They have never stated just cause for the aprehension, just that they thought her dad might be overwhelmed having 3 children, 2 of them being autistic. However, they made this assumption without having ever observed Ayn in her home with her Dad and brothers. Had they done so, they would have seen a very happy home where all children were thriving with their very devoted, loving full time at home Dad. Of course if they have been listening the past 8 months, they would now know the latter facts to be true.

I am thinking it is safe to assume that their knowledge of autism was very limited as well. One would have hoped that by now, 8 months later, they would have consulted with specialists and had become very knowledgeable about autism and particularly how it affects Ayn's ability to communicate, to understand what is happening. But alas this must not have happened yet, otherwise they would not be still holding her in custody and they would not be punishing her for having meltdowns. Any punishment would be wrong, but in this case the punishment was to deprive her of a visit with her mother who she hadn't seen for months. This punishment has lasted a month, the length of time it took for them to reshedule a visit. Ayn's mom has been told she will be able to visit Ayn on March 6 unless of course she has a meltdown, then she will again receive the same punishment. The question is are they telling Ayn ahead of time about this visit? Those who are familiar with autism would be thinking that the meltdown would be a result of Ayn not being able to deal with the emotions she is feeling, unable to communicate, not understanding why she has to wait etc. MCFD staff have been told that it would be best to not tell Ayn ahead of time about the visit, just let her enjoy the happiness the visit will bring to her. We can only hope they will do this. Here is an excellent resource for those with questions about autism wanting to understand what autism is about and how they can be supportive https://sites.google.com/site/fragileworldonthespectrum/

Now, in the past 8 months, Ayn's parents have done all they were asked to do by MCFD. Dad work tirelessly on a porposal he was asked to prepare and submit. He received to recognition of receipt of this porposal. With every rare opportunity to meet with MCFD there is hope that a happy ending is near. On Day 222 Ayn's parents finally had an opportunity to speak at a case conference, a judge present. Not only did they still not hear a reason for Ayn's abduction but trial dates were set to begin next December for a duration of 69 days. Yes, and that will bring the length of Ayn's custody time to 611 days. To this date she has had several visits with her mom, none for months now and none from any other family member. her brothers miss her terribly. To understand her dad's reason please read http://freedomforayn.blogspot.com/2011/10/dereks-decision-re-visiting-ayn-in.html For those who understand autism and how it plays out in Ayn's life dad is doing the best thing he can do for his daughter.

This week Ayn's parents had opportunities to meet MCFD in mediation. It would seem that they will not be allowed to speak about these proceedings but we do know that it was a nightmare. This is very sad news indeed and brings me to continue to ask "HOW CAN THIS BE HAPPENING IN ABBOTSFORD, BRITISH COLUMBIA, CANADA and WHY???"

Are you a parent and if so what would you do in this case?
Do you have a child with autism and if so what are your thoughts?
Are you a specialist in the field of autism; what would your advice be?
Are you family or friend to Ayn and her family, what are your observations?