ANOTHER MISSED VISIT .......................... ON SEPT 5, 2012

by Amie van Dyk

9:40 am was advised that Ayn had a meltdown at school. Apparently she did not want to come for her visit and became violent...

The visit is not even supposed to begin until 12:30 pm... 

I'm pretty devastated. I am only allowed to see her at most 1 1/2hrs a week. 


by Derek Hoare

Hmmm... Not sure exactly how to even begin to summarize the elements of this. I guess i'll start by thanking everyone for taking the time to read this. I guess the best place to start is with the facts and what is implicit in them. As Amie has said she received a call at 20 to 10 this morning informing her the visit was cancelled, that Ayn had melted down in the school. And here we face the first implicit elements. The school does not call Amie to cancel, a series of events transpired prior to us reaching that point, and if we "walk the cat back" we can see what they are. Amie received the call from a community services worker, now they do not make that decision either so they also received a call prior to informing Amie. So a timeline of events begins to form.... Today was likely Ayn's first day (as special needs kids generally miss the first day (Tuesday) as it is shortened and largely administrative). So she likely showed up at school and melted down either shortly before or shortly thereafter, a call would be placed to the foster home, the foster home presumably was left on the situation of bringing the child home. Now generally speaking it is the Social worker who makes the call to cancel visits, and as it so happens Ayn's social worker is away on vacation, so presumably either the decision was made by the "acting" SW on her file or the foster parent. So we can trace the series of calls, from school to foster home to SW to community services to Amie to myself; all this by 9:45. I do not know what precipitated this meltdown, though it would seem likely that it was in fact directly tied to her return to school. It is also likely that the visit was mentioned during the tantrum not prior, not to mention Ayn knows the days of the week so she is well aware she sees mom on wednesdays. All this begs the question why cancel an appointment, due to tantrum 3 hours in advance...? If it was a doctors appointment would they do the same? Are they simply unable to have Ayn keep an appointment? And how would they know she would not be calmed 3 hours later??? And again we have the implicit.... the government has determined how they will deal with Ayn's outbursts.... they drug her... despite the fact that Ayn is drugged daily by them, the outbursts continue. But, Ahh.... they have a solution for that too... an even more powerful neuroleptic drug Seroquel, that is to be administered in situations such as this. This is how they deal with her tantrums, ignore child psychology, ignore autism experts... Drug Her. Now as i'm sure you are aware there is no pill for autism, this is administered solely to induce one of the most common side effects, and sedate my child, to make their lives easier not hers. That is how they knew 3 hours in advance because in all likelihood this visit was cancelled because Ayn has been drugged and they do not want her seen in the resultant state, grrrrrrr. Now to portray this as if they did this because Ayn did not want to go is monstrous.... Since when have they given a damn what Ayn wants?! "I want to go to Daddy's house!" ring any bells?? Don't seem to give a damn when they are forcing Seroquel into her? Now as most if not all parents will know when a child is tantrumming (and certainly most Autistics) they will refuse just about anything other than the thing they want, Ayn does not want to be placated. You could have offered her chocolate and she likely would have refused. And this is where the emotional rollercoaster goes from angry to sad, because I am still left with the reality that Ayn at present is in a basement drugged, this is how they "manage" my child in her "best interest"..... grrrr. The empathy a parent feels for their children is not quantifiable, but those out there who have kids are well aware of what I speak. My little girl is suffering, she is angry, she is confused.... She needs understanding not a damn nerve seizing agent. Regardless of whether she is a child, regardless of whether she is disabled, she has rights. Perhaps if she found herself in some foreign regime she wouldn't, but at home here in Canada she is sure supposed to. And that is the illusion, that is what they don't want canadians to see, that they believe to be their chattel, they believe it is their right to do this to us. Drag us away from our lives and drug us if we protest too loudly.... Don't like it? tell it to the judge..... in 18 months.... oops sorry 'bout the backlog. There is no acceptable recourse for us. People simply do not understand that. They honestly believe that there are mechanisms in place to quickly right these wrongs... Wake up.... because there is not. Oh i'll get to argue my case to a judge.... in December 2012 through February 2013, assuming there are no postponements. To contest an action taken in June 2011.... And all then can simply be easily circumvented by them simply returning right before trial hence avoiding judicial oversight altogether. This is the system we have set up to "protect" children.